Church Bulletin Bloopers


Once again the Church Bulletin Bloopers are back...These are awesome:

- Ushers will eat latecomers.
- She sang "I Will Not Pass This Way Again," giving much pleasure to the congregation.
- Sermon this morning: Jesus Walks on the Water. Sermon tonight: Searching for Jesus.
- The patient is having trouble sleeping and requests tapes of Pastor Jack's sermons.
- Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say "hell " to someone who doesn't care much about you.
- A letter to the men’s fellowship reads: "All members are requested to bring their wives and one other covered dish to the annual banquet."


To see previous Church Bulletin Bloopers click Here

Posted in: , , , on 8.30.2007 at at 08:22  

Valor (Courage)



The car you see in the picture (click picture for better detail) is a Geo Metro, a subcompact car very very tiny. The car shown is pretty much beat up all around, the car is literally falling apart, you can notice how the trunk is kept together with bungee cords. I see this car almost every day in my daily commute and it always makes chuckle because of its license plate. The Spanish word "Valor" can be translated into English as Value or Courage. I personally believe they mean it to be Courage, why would you pay $5o for a personalized license and put Value on it?
So Courage the courageous car always makes me laugh because there is this tiny Geo Metro falling apart with a license plate that says Courage (or Value), it's funny. Either the owner (we assume is Mexican) has a great sense of humor or a lot of Courage. Or maybe the car is of a lot of Value for him.
By the way, avoid at all cost to take a picture while driving a manual shift car on the highway during rush hour, it is absolutely insane. I always get upset at people who drive and speak on their cellphones, I can't imagine all the things that were said to me while taking a picture of Courage.

Posted in: , , , on 8.28.2007 at at 19:29  

Rodrigo Y Gabriela Rocks

The other day I was watching MTV at a friend's house (we don't have cable at home) and I noticed every commercial was preceded by a short clip of a couple playing amazing classic guitar. That couple was Rodrigo Y Gabriela. To my surprise I just found out they are Mexicans and their style is very unique, it sounds like rock but on classic guitars and with a touch of flamenco. It's kind of a weird sound but it is really good. So if you enjoy classic guitar you will definitely like Rodrigo Y Gabriela.



For more videos go to their website Here

Posted in: , , , on 8.26.2007 at at 01:40  

Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence


In case you didn't know ;-)
----------------------------------------
Safety Tips for the Post-Nuclear Existence
1. Never use an elevator in a building that has been hit by a nuclear
bomb; use the stairs.
2. When you're flying through the air, remember to roll when you hit
the ground.
3. If you're on fire, avoid gasoline and other flammable materials.
4. Don't attempt communication with dead people; it will only lead to
psychological problems.
5. Food will be scarce; you will have to scavenge. Learn to recognize
foods that will be available after the bomb: mashed potatoes,
shredded wheat, tossed salad, ground beef, etc.
6. Put your hand over your mouth when you sneeze; internal organs will
be scarce in the post-nuclear age.
7. Try to be neat; fall only in designated piles.
8. Drive carefully in "Heavy Fallout" areas; people could be
staggering illegally.
9. Nutritionally, hundred dollar bills are equal to ones, but more
sanitary due to limited circulation.
10. Accumulate mannequins now; spare parts will be in short supply on
D-Day.

Posted in: , , , on 8.15.2007 at at 09:34  

Small Coffee Pot


I remember the good ol' days of peer pressure at school, I'm pretty sure most of us did stupid things trying to be in the "In" crowd. Although this time is not really the same it kinda' reminds me of those days of peer pressure.
The other day when we had people over, after enjoying some delicious lamb chops I asked our guests if they would like to enjoy some fresh brewed Venezuelan coffee, obviously the answer was yes. Turns out we have a small four cups coffee maker, which I thought would take two pots to satisfy everyone's caffeine needs, eleven people...errr...WRONG. Now, this is a good time for a little cultural comparison; if we would have been all Venezuelans two four cups pots would have been enough...yeeah...not the same here. I was barely able to pour coffee for two when my little pot ran out. So, needless to say I had to make like five pots before it was enough for everyone, me and my little coffee pot were the joke of the day.
You might be wondering why we do we have a four cups coffee maker, well, we really don't need a bigger one because we don't drink coffee at home and we barely have people over, so the expense is not really justified (call me "el cheap-o"), we even have a espresso machine we got for our wedding and we have only used it twice.
Skip to the next day, I don't know if it was coincidence or what, while reading through my reader's feeds I get a deal thanks to Spoofee: ten cups Cuisinart coffee maker for $10 after $10 rebate; well, in less than what you can say "1-2-3 Karate Kid" I bought a new coffee pot...I mean, a deal like that justifies any expense!
So everyone is welcome to come to our house and have some nice Venezuelan coffee. Maybe next time I will use both coffee makers and the espresso machine at the same time...call it my own little coffee shop.

Posted in: , on 8.14.2007 at at 05:59  

Speed Racer: The Movie


Speed Racer is definitely my favorite cartoon hero ever, although it is a cartoon from the 60's, I think it's one of those that will never go away. I pretty much grew up watching it every afternoon as he would race through the hardest circuits against the most evil racers. The Mach5 is a car like no other, with all the special functions on the steering wheel that car can take you anywhere. My favorite buttons are A, C and G which sends the bird robot, man that bird comes in handy sometimes...(sigh) good memories. So, I just found out that Speed Racer: The Movie is on the making (YES!) and it is being directed by the Wachowski brothers, you might remember the Wachowskis from The Matrix and V for Vendetta, so that's just a big sign that the movie it's going to be just great and full of amazing special effects... The movie is set to be released on May 9th, 2008. I can't wait!
Speed Racer: The Movie - Official Website

Posted in: , on 8.10.2007 at at 13:30  

YouTube? No, GodTube!

GodTube is a very good alternative for Internet video addicts whom are worried about the not so clean videos you can stumble upon on sites like YouTube or Google Video or else. Yep, you can find funny stuff, a lot of religious content, of course, and it wouldn't be complete if we didn't have some people preaching really weird things. It's a pretty cool initiative, hopefully it will become pretty popular.

Posted in: , , , on 8.09.2007 at at 14:33  

Facebook Song

Posted in: on 8.08.2007 at at 14:43  

Barry Bonds' Homerun No.756


So Barry Bonds broke the Homerun record last night...(yay)...yep, it is an awesome thing to accomplish but it is really not that great when there is a believable chance that there was some cheating involved. So, my question is: should we still celebrate those whose integrity is in doubt? Those that might have cheated to get to the top?
How about if we make the use of steroids legal in sports and let all athletes perform awesome and amazingly.
I guess we will never know what really heppened, since there is a chance that he might not even go to trial. I don't know what to think anymore.

Posted in: , , on at at 12:01  

Facebook vs. MySpace

I'm not a very big fan of Social Networking sites but unfortunately is the "In" thing these days, you are out of the loop if you are not present in MySpace or Facebook. I have to admit though, it is cool to look people up and connect with old friends. We have a MySpace account and it is there collecting dust, I didn't even like MySpace it felt so clumsy and cluttered and crowded. Banners everywhere, spammers, inappropiate pictures, you name it. Then came Facebook, same thing with different name and looks, so everyone moved to Facebook. So we opened a Facebook account now, yea it looks nicer, cleaner and seems to be more useful, but I still don't buy the whole idea of social networking sites, I mean what's the point? maybe I'm getting old...
So since Facebook is the coolest thing these days what a better way to celebrate than to post a cool video song.

UPDATE: Earlier I had the video embedded but for some reason is now gone. Here is the link for the video.

Posted in: , , , , on at at 08:20  

Zeitgeist


Zeitgeist is a two hours video documentary that is creating quite a buzz in the Internet, so last night I sat and watched the whole thing so I could be informed whenever the bubble bursts and everyone starts talking about it.
This video is like a combination of The Da Vinci Code and Fahrenheit/911 spiced up with conspiracy theories. The documentary is divided in three parts, each part deals with a different subject and although they don't explicitly connect them all it is pretty obvious that's what they are trying to tell you.
Part 1 consists of "revealing the truth" about Jesus and Christianity, they basically say it's all a myth based on pagan cults and astrology, needless to say I was pretty uncomfortable about it because more than proving anything is mostly opinions and even insulting, it didn't make me question my faith but it actually helps me reflects of what I believe and why.
Part 2 moves onto the political scene and most of it is explaining the facts why they believe 9/11 was all staged. I have to admit they make some pretty good points, however, whether it is true or not many people died in that tragic day: fathers, mothers, sisters, brothers, spouses, so I think we need to be respectful to those directly affected by it.
In Part 3 they talk about how the whole economic system is geared to be controlled by a few powerful people whose only aim is to eventually rule the whole world. They also talk about War and how it is used as a tool of economical manipulation and so forth.
I'm pretty bothered by the fact that the movie has no credits, no body claims responsibility for it which I think it is cowardly, I mean, if you know you are right and you know what you're talking about put your name on it.
Another thing I want to say is that it is very bias and subjective and obviously made by someone in the extreme left and involved with the Gnostics. I noticed that in the same style of Michael Moore they take a little bit of truth and stretch it and twist it to be able to make their point.
I don't recommend or condone this movie or the views expressed on it and I definitely don't recommend it to anyone who is easily offended with strong political or religious views. However if you make the choice to watch it, be warned that it has strong language at times and some graphic footage.

Also remember that there are two subjects you never talk about with family: Politics and Religion, so forget about talking about his movie with family.

Posted in: , , , , , on 8.07.2007 at at 08:11  


Our weekend was packed, we had so much going on; here are the highs and the lows. On Saturday I had a softball tournament, our last event for the church team, unfortunately I had a Charlie Brown moment, my worst nightmare came true. It's the bottom of the last inning, we are behind for one run, we have men in first and second, two outs and it is my turn on the plate. I'm not the best player but I know I can hit that ball, I just haven't figured it out how to hit whenever I want. I get ready, pitcher gets ready. First pitch, ball. Second pitch, strike. Third pitch, it looks good so I swing at it, foul ball behind me, the catcher gets ready to catch it and he gets the ball. Arghhh!. It is the worst feeling to be that last out for such a close game. Needless to say I spent the rest of the day beating myself up because of it. Sunday we had 18 people come to our house for an evening BBQ, we had delicious lamb chops and an awesome time to talk and hang out. It was a very good time we got to spend together. Nothing better than food and friends. On top of all that I've "battling" a cold since Friday. I feel much better today but last night I was so hyped after the BBQ that not even Tylenol Night could put me to sleep. So today is one of those day where I need to find ways to stay awake through my shift. Good luck with that.

P.S.: The car abandoned across from our house was also towed last night, yay!

Posted in: , , , on 8.06.2007 at at 09:49  

The Darwinian vs. God Contest


It has been a while since I last posted a religious joke...so I thought this one is one of those that is funny but at the same time makes you think...
The Darwinian vs. God Contest
One day a group of Darwinian scientists got together and decided that man had come a long way and no longer needed God. So they picked one Darwinian to go and tell Him that they were done with Him.The Darwinian walked up to God and said, "God, we've decided that we no longer need you. We're to the point that we can clone people and do many miraculous things, so why don't you just go on and get lost."God listened very patiently and kindly to the man. After the Darwinian was done talking, God said, "Very well, how about this? Let's say we have a man-making contest." To which the Darwinian happily agreed.God added, "Now, we're going to do this just like I did back in the old days with Adam."The Darwinian said, "Sure, no problem," and bent down and grabbed himself a handful of dirt.God looked at him and said, "No, no, no. You go get your own dirt!"

Posted in: , , on 8.03.2007 at at 13:37  

New Look


Well I found this template and I really like the final product. The blog looks simple and cool. I gotta say though the original template was way different than what you are looking at, so I had to put my little knowledge of HTML to work and got it to look the way I wanted it. The polls are still not working though and I also have to restore the other widgets I had. I hope they fix the polls soon, I really like them even though I don't get many votes, I think they are cool though. Well hopefully I will keep this template for quite a while, it is not easy to find cool, free and unique templates for Blogger. Again if you know of any cool websites please let me know.
Another cool thing about this template is that it manages to keep the Blogger navigation bar hidden, cool.

Posted in: on 8.02.2007 at at 21:52  

Messing Around


I'm ready for a new template for our blog, I'm looking for something cool, modern, unique, simple. However, it seems like I picked a bad time to do this, I'm getting all kinds of errors and bad messages from Blogger whenever I try to install a new template, even the in-house templates. By now I pretty much lost all my widgets, I guess I'll have to do 'em all over again. If you know of any cool websites with templates for Blogger please leave a comment. In the meantime let's see what happens...

Posted in: , , on at at 09:16  

ATM In Churches


It is not easy to be a church outside of the ordinary. Whenever churches try to do something different seems like everyone has something to say about it. We humans by nature oppose to change, to new things but it seems like that feeling it's even stronger when it comes to churches. It has always been that way and I guess it will always be that way. Sometimes I even need to remind myself to be open minded and filter it through the bible whatever differences I don't agree with.

The newest paradigm we are facing touches on a very sensitive subject: Money. We all get uncomfortable when the M word is mentioned at church, I still don't know why. These days it is very unusual to carry cash or do any cash transaction. I would say 90% of our monetary transactions are done in some kind of digital/electronic form. This is where the subject of this post comes in, I heard before about churches with ATMs or Credit Card Readers machines where you are able to tithe with your plastic but it wasn't until now that I was able to confirm it.

The Pastor at Stevens Creek Church decided to go for it and founded a...how do you call it? Church ATM Service Company? Basically his company provides ATM machines for churches where you can give your tithes or else and of course he provides this service to the same church where he pastors. That move awarded him an interview with CNN and I agree, it doesn't look good that the pastor of the church also owns the ATM services for his and other churches, but that's not the point, the point is that it is something new and different and seems like some people are having a hard time adjusting. I think CNN wasn't very bias as I thought they would be, however they did a lousy job quoting scripture, that verse in Matthew they quoted was so out of context. Anyways, I still don't get used to the idea of walking into a church and seeing an ATM machine in the lobby, I definitely like how our church does it. I don't know, what do you think? is it tacky? or cool?. I'm still divided about it. I don't think it's a matter of right or wrong, I just think it looks kind of tacky...I don't know...maybe we should have the ones where you pay with your fingerprints :-)


To watch the interview you can click Here

Posted in: , , , , on 8.01.2007 at at 16:50  

I Called The Cops


I did it. Yesterday I called the police station and reported that this car has been sitting across from our house for over a week after being pulled over. They sent an officer to make some marks on the tires to monitor the car and make sure it doesn't move (pretty smart). They said after a few days (?) they will tow the car away if they see it hasn't been moved. I'm still "weirded-out" about it, no body gets a flat tire and abandons the car just like that, unless you have so much money and that's just one of the so many cars you have. That's why I think there is something wrong about the whole picture.
By the way the officer that came didn't show up in a new charger, I wish!...they look so intimidating now with those new cars.

Posted in: , , , on at at 16:10  

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